Here they 5 of the funniest jokes this week in no particular order -

 

1. Women Linesman

I don’t see why people expect female linesman to be worse than male ones.

I mean, if there is something women are good at, it is pointing out mistakes made by men.

 

2. Sofa Cleaning

My new sofa has just arrived… *Hand wash only* reads one of the tags.

Well Dunelm, you’ve excelled yourself.

I was literally seconds away from hauling your new sofa into the washing machine. Thank fuck you warned me.

 

3. Cat vs Washing Machine

Looking at the washing machine go round and round makes me feel sick.

I can’t imagine how the cat feels looking out of it.

 

4. Female Comedian

What’s funnier than a female comedian?

Everything.

 

5. Wii WIN!

I came home from work early one night to find my wife and my best mate, sweaty and breathless in the living room. I said, “What’s going on?”

My wife said, “Erm… We’ve been playing on the Wii Fit.” She winked at my mate and said, “Dave did VERY well.”

As I walked out of the room, I heard them giggling and calling me a “dickhead”, but I had the last laugh. I checked the next day, and none of his scores had even registered!

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